. Only #Bitcoin and Cheese can save Mankind
Monthly Archives: May 2016
05/03/2016Posted by on
This article has been submitted by someone claiming to be representing the REAL Bitcoin Rat from twitter. However we are unable to fully verify the authenticity of the signature or the provenance of the private key being used, as we have not been allowed to keep the original message or laptop.
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In a bizarre twist to the “I am Satoshi” story, Australian businessman Dr. Craig Wright has apparently now retracted his claim to be bitcoins creator and has instead publically identified himself as The Original Bitcoin Rat. According to Fox News this has shaken the bitcoin world to the ‘Core’.
Followers of the official @BitcoinRat twitter account have described the claim as astonishing, and pointed out that the evidence so far presented is far from convincing.
Dr. Wright introduced his claim using a pre-loaded screenshot from his own laptop showing one of the global travelling Rats from the #bitworldtour twitter hashtag, wearing a sun hat with corks around the rim.
Dr. Wright claims that this proves conclusively that the @BitcoinRat originally came from Australia.
As further evidence, he referred to an official tweet last Monday by the BBC’s Rory Cellan-Jones which stated that Dr. Wright had a little rat peeping out of his trouser pocket all the way through their recent dramatic TV interview. Which might explain why Wrights on-screen performance looked troubling.
However, strangely all traces of that particular BBC tweet seem to have now disappeared, which have led some to speculate that the BBC’s twitter account was in fact hacked into, or that the story is just a clever fabrication on Dr. Wrights behalf to cover up his on-going trouser problems.
Digital experts have also cast doubts on the authenticity of Wrights Australian cork hat picture. “It looks like a classic photo-shop cut and paste sting to me” said a spokesman for the CIA, who wished only to be known as ‘Gavin’ ***
However, in another twist Australian bitcoin documentary maker and reporter @MADinMelbourne confirmed that a bitcoin rat she once was looking after had mysteriously disappeared after someone she now believes to be Dr. Wright bumped into her in a Melbourne coffee shop some months ago. “It did seem strange at the time” she said, “especially as he didn’t even bloody stop and say sorry” she continued “I’m sure it was Dr. Wright as the whole coffee shop was full of plain clothes Tax Inspectors that morning”.
So, it is clear that there was a bitcoin rat in Australia, but was it The Original Bitcoin Rat? That is the key question facing the whole bitcoin community according to virtually all of the main street media outlets this week. Only the Economist Magazine has raised doubts on Dr. Wrights latest claim.
So far, neither Dr. Craig Wright nor the original @BitcoinRat has returned journalists calls asking for an interview. But a spokesman for @BitcoinRat said he wasn’t interested in fame or money and just wanted to be left alone, as only bitcoin and cheese can now save Mankind.
*** this is not the well-known Mr. Gavin Andersen, our Legal Team has specifically asked us to point out!
Bloomberg this morning is reporting that since Dr. Wrights second announcement the price of bitcoin temporarily fell by some $10 due to speculative selling of long positions, while shares in Swiss Cheese Makers saw an unexpected similar hike. ”The flight to safe haven investments in Switzerland is significant” said Matt Miller of Bloomberg Surveillance who is due to compile a chart later today which will track everybody named Nakamoto against the recent rise of Banking interest in blockchain start-ups.
Bloomberg has also re-released their “tweet of the day” from January 2014 which clearly shows the Original Bitcoin Rats obsession with Cheese and world economic collapse, something omitted from Dr. Wrights own recent statements.
On another front, veteran bitcoin podcast host Thomas Hunt – known to all as ‘Mad Bitcoins’ – has joined voices such as Andreas Antonopoulos in saying that the true identity behind the @BitcoinRat actually doesn’t matter at all, as it’s the decentralized global nature of the project that is ground-breaking. Andreas reminds us that Prometheus stole fire from Mount Olympus and gave it to Mankind, for which the Gods ( ie Bankers ) never forgave him.
Thomas Hunt added that he too was now getting pretty cheesed off with all the “I am the real Bitcoin Rat” stories and that this latest one seemed to have more holes in it than a slice of Swiss Cheese. “I’ve got a video of The Original Bitcoin Rat” he added “and his accent is definitely that of an English upper-class Twit. If he’s an Australian then I’m a Dingo’s Backside”
Editors Note: No Dingoes were available for comment at the time of publication.
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